It’s Cold Out There

20 Oct

If you say, “Duh, it’s fall,” then you need to shut the hell up.

I realize sometimes it’s cold in Missouri in the fall. I’ve gone trick-or-treating in the snow. The weather isn’t to what I am referring; I’m talking about climate. Political climate. It’s cold and it’s an even year. It’s an election year, a presidential election year.

People, it’s cold. Freezing. People are fighting because it’s so cold. We are fighting for flames to keep warm. We are fighting each other over policies and control of the climate. It’s getting colder. Each debate brings in a new cold front.

Quite honestly, I hate being cold, but I love being blue. I also love being fashionable and having control of my uterus and not paying more taxes than a multi-millionaire, because of these things, I will NEVER EVER support Mittens.

I’m afraid of Mittens because while my hands would be warm, my fingers would be unable to prevent using tampons. But then, tampons would probably be illegal with Mittens.

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